“Ship em off”
Was basically what I heard from Tim Nicholls, The QLD Treasurer, tonight as I watched his dismissive response when pressed about the two Moreton Bay Aged Care facilities that have been marked for closure.
Do you know why?
They are on state-owned, beachfront property; and they are marked for development. Yeah.
Is anyone else’s blood boiling?
I am aware that I am a bit unusual (shhh) in that I have profound and deep roots to the senior members of my family, and I consider myself an advocate for the elderly. I had a very deep connection with my grandparents, who I considered not just the matriarch and patriarch who were due respect and courtesy, and deserved my time, but they were my mates. We enjoyed each other’s company, and had fun together. I miss them painfully, every single day.
From this comes an empirical understanding of the pivotal role the elders in our community; their wisdom, their insight, their experience, and their reason. I am ashamed and embarrassed as westerner to say that our society does not reflect this.
The first world thrives on and encourages busyness, so we’re all forgiven for casting aside the slower-moving members of society, such as the elderly and disabled, because “we don’t have time” (which is bullshit, let’s be real here).
We live in a ageist society; constantly condoning and driving messages of “anti-ageing” this and “youthful” that; Putting mindless teenagers on pedestals, and idolising lyrics like “Ooh baby, ooh baby” instead of learning from the older and wise. We’re not allowed to do what comes naturally, and just get older without being airbrushed, or surgically enhanced, or judged, or even worse (and most often the case) ignored.
We muzzle and invalidate the very people whom we should be listening to the most.
We are doing ourselves an injustice; because communities are strengthened with knowledge; and I don’t care how smart you are, and how many years of academia you have under your belt – life experience is the trump card every time, my friends. Your grandparents, your great uncle, the lady at the bus stop, old mate at the RSL, the people in nursing homes – they have the answers. You might be all connected, and know what’s going on now, but the real insights about life – it’s the older people of our society that have them. You can’t buy that kind of wisdom.
Mr Nicholls of the government I certainly did not vote for (hate to say I told you so, fellow Queenslanders), obviously has not had this epiphany, otherwise he wouldn’t have made himself look like even more of an insensitive phallus by blurting out the words “Plans have been made for several of them to be relocated to other facilities” (Add burdened, dull, tenor in voice to enhance how boring he considered the topic to be).
Right, so by “them”, you’re referring to “humans”, right? Humans who are not only of the most senior in society, and whose respect and care we should hold paramount in all our communities, but also the frailest? And you propose to just rip them out their HOMES, and shove them in another one, against their will? That’s the most fucking brilliantly compassionate and genius plan this soulless government has had to date.
How dare he speak of this with such drudgery, in defense of his office’s deliberate decision to upheave these poor people, disenfranchising them, upsetting them, and potentially un-doing a lot of the good work of the care staff in those facilities, without so much as a “sorry”. Hell, chuck in a token “with regret” or something, to make you seem a bit less heartless and stupid.
The people of the Moreton Bay community have every right to be mad with the government for this decision. And they are mad because the people who made the call obviously have no idea how this works, and exactly how complex caring for the aged is, otherwise they wouldn’t have done it.
If you'd like information on the opposal, see the Queensland Nurses Union.
I encourage every person to seek out a conversation with a senior person. Slow down the pace, work yourself up to a state of patience, show your interest, and listen. Listen for as long as you can and just soak up everything they have to say like a Life-class sponge. I promise you it will enlighten and enliven your soul.
I know you probably disagree. That’s because you’re young...and don't have time. :P
Continue the conversation on Facebook.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Sisters are doing it to themselves.
I am a feminist. Why? Because, as Caitlin Moran puts it: a) I have a vagina; and b) I want to be in charge of it. It shouldn’t be any more complicated than that.
As a feminist, and proud owner of one said vagina, I am increasingly compelled to look at the current feminist position, and wonder exactly what it is “we’re” all “fighting” for?
I am a regular reader of sites such as Jezebel and The Hoopla, and I see a lot of angry, heated-up women demanding “respect”, and shouting on cyber rooftops for “equality”, and pouncing like a pack of wild, hungry mountain cats, on any unfortunate male who happens to string three words together in the “wrong” order.
Can we just hit the pause button for a minute, and someone get me up to speed on what’s happening with this movie, because, before I slipped out for a toilet break, things were going pretty good for women here in the lucky country, as far as I, a woman, could see.
Every woman I have personally come in contact with in my thirty years living in our great country are in charge of their vaginas, so feminism movement = done; women = 1. Very good then. Let’s get on with it. Yeah? Apparently, not.
Almost every day I engage in (or eavesdrop on) conversation with both men and women about the state of equality (or lack thereof). People regurgitate old statistics about women earning 70-odd percent of their male counter-parts, and being discriminated against for breastfeeding in the workplace, and having to do more housework, and having their breasts started at my some creep on the streets, and quack quack quack - the whinging goes on.
I don’t mean to sound like a traitor, fellow ladies, I really don’t; but I can’t help but feel a little let down by the team myself.
For starters, women overall earn less than men in their lifetimes because most choose to stay at home and rare children at some point in their life. Note: the key word here is choose.
The feminist movement was all about choice.
Women just wanted the choice to vote, the choice to sit at a bar, the choice to have sex when and with whom, the choice to proceed with a pregnancy, the choice to go to university, the choice in whatever career she wanted... No-one is forcing you to have kids. We are choosing to sacrifice the overall lifetime equal pay, to have our little bundles of joy. So don’t give me that stat. It’s factually distorted to play to the victim card.
The victim card is old and boring.
If you want a pay rise, or the archaic clown in the office to pipe down about your workplace breastfeeding, or for your husband to help more around the house – do something about it! If you truly want to be seen as an equal, and stand side to your male counterparts, then do what they would do – speak up! They got their payrise, not because they’re men or they’re arseholes; they got it because they asked for it! That’s all there is to it!
Wallowing in your own pathetic-ness, reciting the same old clichés like “I didn’t get the promotion because I’m a woman” only perpetuates a weak, naval-gazing image, and is really just an excuse, so get up, shake it off, and just get it done.
And absolutely - violence against women, rape, mysogony (do we all know what it means now?!) and all forms of injustice against women are deplorable, abhorrent and should not be stood for in any way. So, let’s just continue to fight the good fight on that together. And for God’s sake if you’re in a violent environment, get the hell out, Now. No excuse. He doesn’t love you. Love doesn’t hurt. I can’t be clearer or more serious on that.
Don’t stand for it. Don’t be a victim.
How connected is our current generation of young women to the source of the feminist movement?
I am sceptical. Beyond hearing stories from our mothers and grandmothers, as Australians, we haven’t actually had to endure the real, nasty, gritty, Mad-Men style of exploitation and oppression that our predecessors did. They were fired up – marching, and burning bras, and presenting powerful speeches – because it was very, very real to them.
In a world of a female Prime Minister, icons like Germaine Greer, moguls like Oprah Winfrey, idols like Madonna & Gaga, and powerhouses like Angela Merkel….I think we’re a bit beyond crying about all the injustices against our kind. We really do have the choice to do, be, and have anything we want.
Men are not against us.
There are arseholes is both sexes, let’s be honest. Tarring men with the same brush is so hypocritically counter-productive. We all know good men; some of us even know men whom identify themselves as feminists.
And with all the mixed messages being screamed from the other end of the house, at varying times of each lunar cycle, I think men can be forgiven for wandering around in circles, scratching their head and wondering what the hell their place in society is these days?
They are expected to be the breadwinners, do 50% of housework; compliment you, not ask you for sex, not seek sex anywhere else, remain sexually attracted to you at all times (even when you’re at your ugliest), read your mind, know exactly what will offend one women, and what the next wont even bat an eyelash at; be strong; be sensitive; like your family; accept you not liking his; take it when you feel like verbally beating him to an emasculated shell; and basically just do whatever the hell you say. Don’t you think this kind of treatment would result to resentment? Rebellion? A movement, perhaps?
I once worked with a woman who would share stores with pride, of how she condescended her husband on a daily basis over his inability to prepare dinner. She reminded him regularly that because she was the home keeper, the family and the unit would literally fall apart without her. Now, I’m not doubting that she was the rock of the family; a strong, loving mother who ran a great household – but I wonder what her reaction would be if her husband (an intelligent academic and very successful businessman) patronised her for her inability to do his Engineering job. I imagine a Loony Tunes-esque cat fight.
It’s all well and good for us to say “Well, I am the woman, I will do what I want!” But is that really fair? Is that a partnership? Is that equality?
I firmly believe that if we really want “respect” and “equality” then we need to “fight” a fair game. Let’s start giving the good men in the world the respect they deserve and not use them as our punching bags just because, let’s face it, we sometime don’t even know what is wrong with us.
Sisters, we are doing it to ourselves.
Chris Rock says women would rule the world by now, if we didn’t hate each other.
Iyanla Vanzant says that women fight each other because they feel that if “she” gets hers, then there won’t be enough left for me. Men, on the other hand think “If I get mine, then I don’t care about you”.
Women have an innate propensity for care, support, and nurture. This is vital for humanity’s progress. But, let’s be honest: we judge each other all the time.
If we really want men to start treating us better, perhaps we should look into our own female backyard, and start at home, so to speak.
More Mirror, Australia discussion happening on Facebook.
As a feminist, and proud owner of one said vagina, I am increasingly compelled to look at the current feminist position, and wonder exactly what it is “we’re” all “fighting” for?
I am a regular reader of sites such as Jezebel and The Hoopla, and I see a lot of angry, heated-up women demanding “respect”, and shouting on cyber rooftops for “equality”, and pouncing like a pack of wild, hungry mountain cats, on any unfortunate male who happens to string three words together in the “wrong” order.
Can we just hit the pause button for a minute, and someone get me up to speed on what’s happening with this movie, because, before I slipped out for a toilet break, things were going pretty good for women here in the lucky country, as far as I, a woman, could see.
Every woman I have personally come in contact with in my thirty years living in our great country are in charge of their vaginas, so feminism movement = done; women = 1. Very good then. Let’s get on with it. Yeah? Apparently, not.
Almost every day I engage in (or eavesdrop on) conversation with both men and women about the state of equality (or lack thereof). People regurgitate old statistics about women earning 70-odd percent of their male counter-parts, and being discriminated against for breastfeeding in the workplace, and having to do more housework, and having their breasts started at my some creep on the streets, and quack quack quack - the whinging goes on.
I don’t mean to sound like a traitor, fellow ladies, I really don’t; but I can’t help but feel a little let down by the team myself.
For starters, women overall earn less than men in their lifetimes because most choose to stay at home and rare children at some point in their life. Note: the key word here is choose.
The feminist movement was all about choice.
Women just wanted the choice to vote, the choice to sit at a bar, the choice to have sex when and with whom, the choice to proceed with a pregnancy, the choice to go to university, the choice in whatever career she wanted... No-one is forcing you to have kids. We are choosing to sacrifice the overall lifetime equal pay, to have our little bundles of joy. So don’t give me that stat. It’s factually distorted to play to the victim card.
The victim card is old and boring.
If you want a pay rise, or the archaic clown in the office to pipe down about your workplace breastfeeding, or for your husband to help more around the house – do something about it! If you truly want to be seen as an equal, and stand side to your male counterparts, then do what they would do – speak up! They got their payrise, not because they’re men or they’re arseholes; they got it because they asked for it! That’s all there is to it!
Wallowing in your own pathetic-ness, reciting the same old clichés like “I didn’t get the promotion because I’m a woman” only perpetuates a weak, naval-gazing image, and is really just an excuse, so get up, shake it off, and just get it done.
And absolutely - violence against women, rape, mysogony (do we all know what it means now?!) and all forms of injustice against women are deplorable, abhorrent and should not be stood for in any way. So, let’s just continue to fight the good fight on that together. And for God’s sake if you’re in a violent environment, get the hell out, Now. No excuse. He doesn’t love you. Love doesn’t hurt. I can’t be clearer or more serious on that.
Don’t stand for it. Don’t be a victim.
How connected is our current generation of young women to the source of the feminist movement?
I am sceptical. Beyond hearing stories from our mothers and grandmothers, as Australians, we haven’t actually had to endure the real, nasty, gritty, Mad-Men style of exploitation and oppression that our predecessors did. They were fired up – marching, and burning bras, and presenting powerful speeches – because it was very, very real to them.
In a world of a female Prime Minister, icons like Germaine Greer, moguls like Oprah Winfrey, idols like Madonna & Gaga, and powerhouses like Angela Merkel….I think we’re a bit beyond crying about all the injustices against our kind. We really do have the choice to do, be, and have anything we want.
Men are not against us.
There are arseholes is both sexes, let’s be honest. Tarring men with the same brush is so hypocritically counter-productive. We all know good men; some of us even know men whom identify themselves as feminists.
And with all the mixed messages being screamed from the other end of the house, at varying times of each lunar cycle, I think men can be forgiven for wandering around in circles, scratching their head and wondering what the hell their place in society is these days?
They are expected to be the breadwinners, do 50% of housework; compliment you, not ask you for sex, not seek sex anywhere else, remain sexually attracted to you at all times (even when you’re at your ugliest), read your mind, know exactly what will offend one women, and what the next wont even bat an eyelash at; be strong; be sensitive; like your family; accept you not liking his; take it when you feel like verbally beating him to an emasculated shell; and basically just do whatever the hell you say. Don’t you think this kind of treatment would result to resentment? Rebellion? A movement, perhaps?
I once worked with a woman who would share stores with pride, of how she condescended her husband on a daily basis over his inability to prepare dinner. She reminded him regularly that because she was the home keeper, the family and the unit would literally fall apart without her. Now, I’m not doubting that she was the rock of the family; a strong, loving mother who ran a great household – but I wonder what her reaction would be if her husband (an intelligent academic and very successful businessman) patronised her for her inability to do his Engineering job. I imagine a Loony Tunes-esque cat fight.
It’s all well and good for us to say “Well, I am the woman, I will do what I want!” But is that really fair? Is that a partnership? Is that equality?
I firmly believe that if we really want “respect” and “equality” then we need to “fight” a fair game. Let’s start giving the good men in the world the respect they deserve and not use them as our punching bags just because, let’s face it, we sometime don’t even know what is wrong with us.
Sisters, we are doing it to ourselves.
Chris Rock says women would rule the world by now, if we didn’t hate each other.
Iyanla Vanzant says that women fight each other because they feel that if “she” gets hers, then there won’t be enough left for me. Men, on the other hand think “If I get mine, then I don’t care about you”.
Women have an innate propensity for care, support, and nurture. This is vital for humanity’s progress. But, let’s be honest: we judge each other all the time.
If we really want men to start treating us better, perhaps we should look into our own female backyard, and start at home, so to speak.
More Mirror, Australia discussion happening on Facebook.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Heart + Action = results.
It’s Anti-Poverty Week this week.
Whilst I am doing my degree, I am working for a Not-For-Profit organisation that has a robust Social Justice program that I am very proud to participate in. I feel I am able to say that each day, whilst I work towards my goal of being university educated and improving myself, I am also genuinely helping to make a difference in people’s lives at work; that what I do matters. That’s a great feeling.
The fact that I no longer feel helpless about the world’s greater issues is key to this great feeling. As someone with a conscience, and wanting desperately to help everyone, it can be very overwhelming knowing you are but one person…and where the hell do you start?!
Most people adopt the defeatist conclusion that their sole efforts wont make a dint in the issue, and give up.
Other people like to dig their heels on the notion that a tough outlook and material-focused lifestyle is cool, and anyone who does not prioritise climbing the corporate ladder; or who speaks up on animal welfare, or human rights, or the environment, is just a tree huggin hippie that should be shipped off to some island with the rest of them, where they won’t bother those of us who just want to rape and pillage the earth in peace, thanks very much.
I, personally think the former is more dangerous than the latter. And so did Albert Einstein, who said:
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it".
I’m all for “live and let live”. Not because I’m a Buddist monk, but because I’m too lazy to get worked up about people who don’t share my views and beliefs about this world. I have learned, as I have got older, that you can’t change people. You can only change yourself. As Gandhi said;
"Be the change you want to see in the world”.
I know this is a busy world, and we can't do it all. I'm simply sharing that I’ve learned that a kind heart is not enough to make this world a better place; Taking actions motivated by your kind heart is.
This busy time of year is a better time than any to contemplate what you want to do with the next stage of your life, what matters to you, what kind of positive impact you can have on the people and environment around you – but most importantly – how you’re going to achieve it.
I recently watched a brief TED Talk by Jody Williams; a Nobel Peace Laureate, who had a very pragmatic opinion on peace, and how to facilitate a dignified life for all humans. She reiterated the notion that positive change comes from real action.
I know I’m in very good company. The World Giving Index through Charities Aid Foundation (CAF) recently found that Australia & New Zealand are the most GIVING nations in the world! We're top people!
If you want to take action on the things that matter, like eradicating poverty from our world – start with this hepful resource from Philanthropy Australia or find out what Volunteer Opportunities are available that suit you.
Whilst I am doing my degree, I am working for a Not-For-Profit organisation that has a robust Social Justice program that I am very proud to participate in. I feel I am able to say that each day, whilst I work towards my goal of being university educated and improving myself, I am also genuinely helping to make a difference in people’s lives at work; that what I do matters. That’s a great feeling.
The fact that I no longer feel helpless about the world’s greater issues is key to this great feeling. As someone with a conscience, and wanting desperately to help everyone, it can be very overwhelming knowing you are but one person…and where the hell do you start?!
Most people adopt the defeatist conclusion that their sole efforts wont make a dint in the issue, and give up.
Other people like to dig their heels on the notion that a tough outlook and material-focused lifestyle is cool, and anyone who does not prioritise climbing the corporate ladder; or who speaks up on animal welfare, or human rights, or the environment, is just a tree huggin hippie that should be shipped off to some island with the rest of them, where they won’t bother those of us who just want to rape and pillage the earth in peace, thanks very much.
I, personally think the former is more dangerous than the latter. And so did Albert Einstein, who said:
"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it".
I’m all for “live and let live”. Not because I’m a Buddist monk, but because I’m too lazy to get worked up about people who don’t share my views and beliefs about this world. I have learned, as I have got older, that you can’t change people. You can only change yourself. As Gandhi said;
"Be the change you want to see in the world”.
I know this is a busy world, and we can't do it all. I'm simply sharing that I’ve learned that a kind heart is not enough to make this world a better place; Taking actions motivated by your kind heart is.
This busy time of year is a better time than any to contemplate what you want to do with the next stage of your life, what matters to you, what kind of positive impact you can have on the people and environment around you – but most importantly – how you’re going to achieve it.
I recently watched a brief TED Talk by Jody Williams; a Nobel Peace Laureate, who had a very pragmatic opinion on peace, and how to facilitate a dignified life for all humans. She reiterated the notion that positive change comes from real action.
I know I’m in very good company. The World Giving Index through Charities Aid Foundation (CAF) recently found that Australia & New Zealand are the most GIVING nations in the world! We're top people!
If you want to take action on the things that matter, like eradicating poverty from our world – start with this hepful resource from Philanthropy Australia or find out what Volunteer Opportunities are available that suit you.
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Getting excited (again)
You know the days when you’re high on life? When the nervous energy of excitement darts through you; and you feel genuinely inspired and energised with anticipation of your future? When you’re ready to take on whatever is thrown at you? When you’re smiling on the inside?
It is a truly riveting feeling, and I'm so happy to say I’ve been feeling that increasingly over the last couple of months; as if June was the valley, I’m now gliding up the slow incline of the mountain named Life.
I caught myself buzzing today; with ideas, thoughts of gratitude, happiness, contentment; and I reflected on times when I had felt this before. Every time it was followed by a deep slump of mood, or a disappointment that set me back, knocked the wind out of me, or beat the confidence out of me.
This time, it’s different…
Now, a little older, experienced, and comfortable in my skin, I’m starting to feel that I really can take it on – not just with false naivety of youth and unrealistic expectations. This time I know what I’m capable of, and what’s more – I know I’m responsible for getting what I want out of life. That is an empowering secret to unlock – even if it is obvious and simplistic. Having been told something a million times throughout your life, repeating it, preaching it to other people, reposting a cutesy little phrase about it on Facebook….none of it is quite like the penny dropping for the first time!
I have deep-seated memories of feeling quite the opposite;
memories still relatively fresh, in fact. I have had reoccurring depression for several years, and even though it is a hideous, painful condition to bare, I wouldn’t take it back for the world, because:
a) just like living with a myriad of physical illnesses, I can function as very productive of member of society with it; and
b) it has helped me understand who I really am.
But more importantly it also gives me insight to the pain of others experiencing mood disorders, and I want to help.
So, this is why I talk about it
– the one and only reason I talk about it – to remove the taboo, and make this world smaller for people who feel isolated or alone. Our society must learn to speak as freely about mental health as it does the common cold.
Ignore the twats!
I also know one of the biggest, most challenging, and excruciating hurdles a person with a mood disorder can overcome, is that of allowing one’s self to be happy. I have struggled with that for years; and despite how many wonderful, supportive, loving people I have around me, who encourage and compliment me all the time; it is the one voice of the one twat from a million years ago that burrows in and does it’s damage long after they’ve moved on and forgotten about it. This is key to long-term recovery and flourishing: Ignore the twats!
Knowing how it feels on the other side, just the same as the feeling you get from exercising for the first time, makes you want to do it again. When I feel down, I try to focus my attention and energy to replicating my own approach to situations in order to regain the inner feeling of happiness I have experienced before – knowing that I’m capable, and that it will return.
I’ve tapped into the internal dialogue that isn’t just psychological, but physiological; and now I listen, not just to my thoughts but my body as well. Sometimes your body can tell a more accurate story than your mind can.
I recommend taking some quiet time to observe how your body reacts to situations, people, places, and ask yourself if you want continue feeling that or not. If the answer is the later, all you have to do is remove yourself from that situation/person/place, and your body will thank you with a burst of energy that might represent anything from confidence, to empowerment, to calm. Do, see, and surround yourself with the things and people that give you energy.
I believe that, like a domino, the state of the mind dictates the health and well-being of everything else; physical health, and therefore energy levels, and therefore input and emotional presence at work, school, home, in relationships; and therefore the success of those things; and therefore the ability to extend yourself, grow, learn, evolve as a person, and therefore connect to your spirituality and higher self, and therefore invite more positive things into your life; and therefore positively influence people around you, and therefore make the world a better place! Idealistic? I prefer to think not.
The mind is everything.
If we all started with making our own minds healthy, inviting, places to go, we could collectively shape a community better than the one we live in today.
Lifeline, Beyond Blue, Wesley Mission, Relationships Australia, QUT Counselling Service & Caritas Care have all helped me through my journey.
One of my new goals in life is to give back to places like them to express my gratitude, and pay it forward, by offering support in any way I can to others experiencing mental health issues.
If you need help; seek it out:
Lifeline: 13 11 14
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 46 36
Wesley Mission: (02) 9263 5555
Relationships Australia: 1300 364 277
If you want to help; seek a way:
Lifeline
Beyond Blue
Wesley Mission
Relationships Australia
100 Things: People Helping People
I'm genuinely excited about my future, and I hope you are too :)
Monday, September 24, 2012
Why so miserable, Brilliant?
I know I’m not the first to ask this question. Unlike a smattering of brilliant minds that have bestowed this earth with the creations formed of their enviable imaginations, I will not present to you an original idea here.
The question stirred in me today, not for the first time, when I observed my sudden abundance of writing inspiration; the same inspiration that has been conspicuously absent up in Thoughts HQ of late (I won’t deny there has been talk around the water cooler).
But in the last forty-eight hours, I have been compelled to write, in way I have not for quite some time. As my two most recent blogs might attest, I haven’t been in the best of moods – and I wonder if that is why?
On reflection, my most lavish, and quality, production of words came at a time in my life when I was the most depressed; I could not write enough; poetry and lyrics were like therapy; like journaling. And, respectively, the periods I have concerned myself with being ‘unable’ to write anything; or wanting for inspiration, were times I have been happiest.
Commonly admired and immortalised creatives including Miles Davies, Jim Morrison, Vincent Van Gough, Virginia Woolf, and Kurt Cobain (to name but a few) are known for their erraticism and self-harm, as much as they are known for their art.
Mark Moldre observes Phil Spector’s public plight in ‘Troubled Genius’, and the movies about Johnny Cash, John Nash, and the rest are common fare. It is a long list.
I have worked with people whom are great as artists, but, frankly, arseholes as people. Some people wear their creativity like a heavy coat – pulling out the clichéd tortured artist card at every opportunity – and if they are actually good enough at what they do, most people forgive them. I’m far too much of a cynic for that. In my mind, they’re just arseholes; and no amount of art is an excuse to be an arsehole. Sorry.
Others, such as the aforementioned Ms Woolf, used art as way of expressing and processing the inner turmoil they were predisposed with. A certain amount of genetic imbalance might be credited for some of the most celebrated works we are lucky enough to share today; Swedish researcher, Fredrik Ullén, of the Karolinska Institutet in Stockholm was quoted suggesting “Thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box”. Well there’s a back-handed compliment for all you crazy genius’ out there!
So, why are the people who bring the most pleasure to the world, often the most miserable?
Whilst research on the relationship between creativity and mental illness shows a positive strong correlation, not every creative person need fear the label (just don’t be an arsehole), and I admit it is hard to control the ego in a world where celebrity is such a valuable currency; so people on the side-lines will allow people who do not have a genuine grievance with genetics or chemicals, to act the fool because “that’s what creatives do”. Fuck that. Pull your head in and be grateful you have a gift sans the burden of a mood disorder.
I am not aligning myself with these exceptional minds in any way – I have simply observed that my bad moods, generally mean good writing time. How does a creative person negotiate this? I think I made it pretty clear earlier that my patience for arseholes is minimal, so why would I strive to be one myself; and therefore, I would be amiss to pursue a path where I must ‘suffer for my art’. I don’t want to be a good, committed, prolific writer if the tradeoff is mental instability. Others might feel differently.
Tell me.
The question stirred in me today, not for the first time, when I observed my sudden abundance of writing inspiration; the same inspiration that has been conspicuously absent up in Thoughts HQ of late (I won’t deny there has been talk around the water cooler).
But in the last forty-eight hours, I have been compelled to write, in way I have not for quite some time. As my two most recent blogs might attest, I haven’t been in the best of moods – and I wonder if that is why?
On reflection, my most lavish, and quality, production of words came at a time in my life when I was the most depressed; I could not write enough; poetry and lyrics were like therapy; like journaling. And, respectively, the periods I have concerned myself with being ‘unable’ to write anything; or wanting for inspiration, were times I have been happiest.
Commonly admired and immortalised creatives including Miles Davies, Jim Morrison, Vincent Van Gough, Virginia Woolf, and Kurt Cobain (to name but a few) are known for their erraticism and self-harm, as much as they are known for their art.
Mark Moldre observes Phil Spector’s public plight in ‘Troubled Genius’, and the movies about Johnny Cash, John Nash, and the rest are common fare. It is a long list.
I have worked with people whom are great as artists, but, frankly, arseholes as people. Some people wear their creativity like a heavy coat – pulling out the clichéd tortured artist card at every opportunity – and if they are actually good enough at what they do, most people forgive them. I’m far too much of a cynic for that. In my mind, they’re just arseholes; and no amount of art is an excuse to be an arsehole. Sorry.
Others, such as the aforementioned Ms Woolf, used art as way of expressing and processing the inner turmoil they were predisposed with. A certain amount of genetic imbalance might be credited for some of the most celebrated works we are lucky enough to share today; Swedish researcher, Fredrik Ullén, of the Karolinska Institutet in Stockholm was quoted suggesting “Thinking outside the box might be facilitated by having a somewhat less intact box”. Well there’s a back-handed compliment for all you crazy genius’ out there!
So, why are the people who bring the most pleasure to the world, often the most miserable?
Whilst research on the relationship between creativity and mental illness shows a positive strong correlation, not every creative person need fear the label (just don’t be an arsehole), and I admit it is hard to control the ego in a world where celebrity is such a valuable currency; so people on the side-lines will allow people who do not have a genuine grievance with genetics or chemicals, to act the fool because “that’s what creatives do”. Fuck that. Pull your head in and be grateful you have a gift sans the burden of a mood disorder.
I am not aligning myself with these exceptional minds in any way – I have simply observed that my bad moods, generally mean good writing time. How does a creative person negotiate this? I think I made it pretty clear earlier that my patience for arseholes is minimal, so why would I strive to be one myself; and therefore, I would be amiss to pursue a path where I must ‘suffer for my art’. I don’t want to be a good, committed, prolific writer if the tradeoff is mental instability. Others might feel differently.
Tell me.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Honey, where did I leave my Ambition?
I have a lot going on; I am studying a Business degree full-time, and work in a busy role part-time; I have exercise commitments three times a week, a social life, a house to clean, dinners to cook, and blogs to write. The list goes on; plus there’s always ironing…
I have no reason to be bored; Yet, I am.
A terrible guilt washes over me for even saying it aloud; but, you know; the first step, and all that…
I have spent the last twelve months wandering aimlessly around my home, my casual and part-time jobs, my study, and my social life, wondering what the hell is wrong with me. When will it kick back in? The elusive “’It” is ambition; drive; appetite for life.
I know I sound like a spoiled first-world brat; and perhaps I am (the reason for writing these thoughts in a public forum is to invite conversation, so go on, tell me how it is), but is it just a ‘mood’, or has something inherent shifted in me that I will never get back?
Taking on the world
From since I can remember I was a bright, ambitious girl with big ideas and enough energy and enthusiasm to make them happen. I spent thirteen years pursuing a career as a Music Administrator – a job I fell over myself to obtain and achieve in; I had immense pride in my work and an incomparable care-factor – I sacrificed personal comforts, relationships, I’ll go as far as to say destiny, for the greater good of the job, the company, the art. I gave it everything I had.
A new chapter?
Last year, after many months of painstaking soul searching, garnished with a physical breakdown, I finally made the decision that the career I had been pursuing all these years, was no longer for me (read: I was no longer for it). I said my goodbyes and stepped out onto the sunny pavement feeling lighter than I had in years. This was the right decision for me. I was ready to start a new chapter in my professional life, and it was going to feel good.
After four months of applying for part-time work I started to get worried. I was scoring some temping work here and there, but times were tough, and I needed something stable. But on reflection I know I wasn’t getting permanent jobs because I didn’t really want them. I felt so emotionally affected from my ‘break-up’ with music that I just wanted the license to bury my head under a pillow and eat ice cream the other heartbroken women get.
I spent hours, days, weeks, months, thinking about what it was I actually wanted to do. “I like cooking – Maybe I could open a café? I like helping – maybe I can work in a charity? I like animals – maybe I should be a vet? I like writing – Maybe I should live in the mountains and start on a manuscript? I like getting in over my head – Maybe I could commit to saving the world? I am good at Administration – maybe I should just go and get a fucking job? But I don’t want just any fucking job – I want something I love – something I’m passionate about…I wish I could move to Byron Bay. I like yoga… ” And on it went.
Who am I?
I searched in every nook and cranny in my mind, and nowhere could I pin-point the next dream job to go bounding after with all the pathetic slobbering enthusiasm I had with my previous goal. I hit wall after wall. It wasn’t just that I couldn’t think of anything I wanted to do – after entering into music because I was passionate about music, and ending up hating it – I was scared that if I chose something I liked/loved to work in, I’d end up hating that too (a friend of mine once told me that I “over-think things” – what do you reckon?).
It became somwhat of a self-identitiy crisis, as I found myself suddenly missing something that used to make up a massive part of who I was. When asked socially what I do,I even caught myself saying(and later berrated myself), "Well I used to work in music bla bla bla...and now I'm...." It took me along time to figure out how to 're-answer' that question.
Priorities
I wrote myself a list of all the things I want in a job, and then I started to apply. I got the perfect-on-paper job. It is a truly wonderful job, with wonderful people. Yet, I am left wanting.
It’s now twelve months since I left my ambitious self behind and I’m still no closer to finding something that I just have to do – A vision to work towards; and end goal. And I realise it is affecting my approach to the rest of my life. I’ve become slow, lazy, sloppy. There is a saying that if you want something done, ask the busiest person in the room. Busyness creates busyness, and ultimately momentum.
I’ve lost my momentum.
Or have I? Is it simply that I am growing up, and that I realise that work and career isn’t the be all and end all? Am I just mellowing out? Does career have to have such importance in a person’s whole life, just because it once did? Am I just a first-world brat that has developed Flat-Affect and just bored with everything? Do we have to love what we do – like we keep being told? Is it simply time for me to hang up the dreams of yester-year and bunker down for House-keeping? Am I just giving up?
I’m not saying I’ve entirely lost hope that it will ever return; but I’m standing at a blank drawing board, waiting for lightning to strike.
I’m interested to know if there’s any other career women out there who have had a change of heart, and how you’ve navigated your way through it. Tell me about it.
I have no reason to be bored; Yet, I am.
A terrible guilt washes over me for even saying it aloud; but, you know; the first step, and all that…
I have spent the last twelve months wandering aimlessly around my home, my casual and part-time jobs, my study, and my social life, wondering what the hell is wrong with me. When will it kick back in? The elusive “’It” is ambition; drive; appetite for life.
I know I sound like a spoiled first-world brat; and perhaps I am (the reason for writing these thoughts in a public forum is to invite conversation, so go on, tell me how it is), but is it just a ‘mood’, or has something inherent shifted in me that I will never get back?
Taking on the world
From since I can remember I was a bright, ambitious girl with big ideas and enough energy and enthusiasm to make them happen. I spent thirteen years pursuing a career as a Music Administrator – a job I fell over myself to obtain and achieve in; I had immense pride in my work and an incomparable care-factor – I sacrificed personal comforts, relationships, I’ll go as far as to say destiny, for the greater good of the job, the company, the art. I gave it everything I had.
A new chapter?
Last year, after many months of painstaking soul searching, garnished with a physical breakdown, I finally made the decision that the career I had been pursuing all these years, was no longer for me (read: I was no longer for it). I said my goodbyes and stepped out onto the sunny pavement feeling lighter than I had in years. This was the right decision for me. I was ready to start a new chapter in my professional life, and it was going to feel good.
After four months of applying for part-time work I started to get worried. I was scoring some temping work here and there, but times were tough, and I needed something stable. But on reflection I know I wasn’t getting permanent jobs because I didn’t really want them. I felt so emotionally affected from my ‘break-up’ with music that I just wanted the license to bury my head under a pillow and eat ice cream the other heartbroken women get.
I spent hours, days, weeks, months, thinking about what it was I actually wanted to do. “I like cooking – Maybe I could open a café? I like helping – maybe I can work in a charity? I like animals – maybe I should be a vet? I like writing – Maybe I should live in the mountains and start on a manuscript? I like getting in over my head – Maybe I could commit to saving the world? I am good at Administration – maybe I should just go and get a fucking job? But I don’t want just any fucking job – I want something I love – something I’m passionate about…I wish I could move to Byron Bay. I like yoga… ” And on it went.
Who am I?
I searched in every nook and cranny in my mind, and nowhere could I pin-point the next dream job to go bounding after with all the pathetic slobbering enthusiasm I had with my previous goal. I hit wall after wall. It wasn’t just that I couldn’t think of anything I wanted to do – after entering into music because I was passionate about music, and ending up hating it – I was scared that if I chose something I liked/loved to work in, I’d end up hating that too (a friend of mine once told me that I “over-think things” – what do you reckon?).
It became somwhat of a self-identitiy crisis, as I found myself suddenly missing something that used to make up a massive part of who I was. When asked socially what I do,I even caught myself saying(and later berrated myself), "Well I used to work in music bla bla bla...and now I'm...." It took me along time to figure out how to 're-answer' that question.
Priorities
I wrote myself a list of all the things I want in a job, and then I started to apply. I got the perfect-on-paper job. It is a truly wonderful job, with wonderful people. Yet, I am left wanting.
It’s now twelve months since I left my ambitious self behind and I’m still no closer to finding something that I just have to do – A vision to work towards; and end goal. And I realise it is affecting my approach to the rest of my life. I’ve become slow, lazy, sloppy. There is a saying that if you want something done, ask the busiest person in the room. Busyness creates busyness, and ultimately momentum.
I’ve lost my momentum.
Or have I? Is it simply that I am growing up, and that I realise that work and career isn’t the be all and end all? Am I just mellowing out? Does career have to have such importance in a person’s whole life, just because it once did? Am I just a first-world brat that has developed Flat-Affect and just bored with everything? Do we have to love what we do – like we keep being told? Is it simply time for me to hang up the dreams of yester-year and bunker down for House-keeping? Am I just giving up?
I’m not saying I’ve entirely lost hope that it will ever return; but I’m standing at a blank drawing board, waiting for lightning to strike.
I’m interested to know if there’s any other career women out there who have had a change of heart, and how you’ve navigated your way through it. Tell me about it.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
My vegan challenge - The end
Well, my vegan challenge is officially over.
Not just because it has passed the 1st August, marking one full month since my announcement to embark on said challenge; But also because I lost the plot around week three and ate some Beef Ragout.
What am I if not honest?
I feel (kind of) ok about it because I didn’t receive any more donations after Week 3 anyway. Or perhaps was that just the universe picking up the scent of slow-cooked beast on my breath, and therefore boycotting me and my goal?
I’m fine with it anyway. I have raised $508.00 for the RSPCA QLD, for which I received a letter of gratitude and a certificate that says I’m a top person. So even though I ate some animals…I also saved some.
So here's the wrap-up:
What I liked:
- Experimenting with meals
- Feeling light and healthy
- Vegan meals after my Yoga class at Govindas
- Feeling 100% guilt free about every single thing I ate
- Learning about nourishment and food
- Almond milk!
What I didn’t like:
- The weird lectures I got from people
- Tempeh (sorry, I tried)
- Being verbally bludgeoned with the word ‘Calcium!’ seemingly constantly
- Not eating butter
- Not eating cheese
- Not eating fish
- Watching other people eat butter, cheese and fish
What I learned:
- A vegan diet is a very affective weight-loss diet
- Most people I spoke with think their nourishment mostly comes from meat and milk. I find that weird.
- I am a sucker for butter, cheese, and ragout
- People who are on a vegan challenge try to off-set their overwhelming secret desire to steal the bacon off your plate with lectures about sustainability, animal cruelty and health. And most people who are not on the vegan challenge will both ignore said lectures with the stubbornness of a knifed Labour leader; and protect their bacon with the cruel arrogance of Simon Cowell.
- I will never be a full-time vegan
Thank you so much to everyone who donated – a little thank you gift is in the post for you this week.
And to all who offered their support, and believed I could make it; sorry.
I’ll post a few more groovy recipes up soon for those who are interested!
Peace out – and stay tuned for the next conversation at Mirror, Australia.
Not just because it has passed the 1st August, marking one full month since my announcement to embark on said challenge; But also because I lost the plot around week three and ate some Beef Ragout.
What am I if not honest?
I feel (kind of) ok about it because I didn’t receive any more donations after Week 3 anyway. Or perhaps was that just the universe picking up the scent of slow-cooked beast on my breath, and therefore boycotting me and my goal?
I’m fine with it anyway. I have raised $508.00 for the RSPCA QLD, for which I received a letter of gratitude and a certificate that says I’m a top person. So even though I ate some animals…I also saved some.
So here's the wrap-up:
What I liked:
- Experimenting with meals
- Feeling light and healthy
- Vegan meals after my Yoga class at Govindas
- Feeling 100% guilt free about every single thing I ate
- Learning about nourishment and food
- Almond milk!
What I didn’t like:
- The weird lectures I got from people
- Tempeh (sorry, I tried)
- Being verbally bludgeoned with the word ‘Calcium!’ seemingly constantly
- Not eating butter
- Not eating cheese
- Not eating fish
- Watching other people eat butter, cheese and fish
What I learned:
- A vegan diet is a very affective weight-loss diet
- Most people I spoke with think their nourishment mostly comes from meat and milk. I find that weird.
- I am a sucker for butter, cheese, and ragout
- People who are on a vegan challenge try to off-set their overwhelming secret desire to steal the bacon off your plate with lectures about sustainability, animal cruelty and health. And most people who are not on the vegan challenge will both ignore said lectures with the stubbornness of a knifed Labour leader; and protect their bacon with the cruel arrogance of Simon Cowell.
- I will never be a full-time vegan
Thank you so much to everyone who donated – a little thank you gift is in the post for you this week.
And to all who offered their support, and believed I could make it; sorry.
I’ll post a few more groovy recipes up soon for those who are interested!
Peace out – and stay tuned for the next conversation at Mirror, Australia.
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